Trans Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs

                             
                                              Face Book:  Transgender Christians In Chains
                                     
                                              Email:          BobbieLang@reagan.com

                                  Trans Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs

     When I started my gender transitioning from male to female I knew that there would be many missteps and mistakes made along this perilous trail.  I had spent and exorbitant amount of time observing the traits, methods, mannerisms and persona of the typical woman in various environments ie, malls (while shopping), restaurants, sporting events and the workplace.  I knew if I wanted to be viewed and “pass” as a woman that there would be a number of things I would have to assimilate.  As a man, though small and skinny, I was very masculine in demeanor and I knew this new image would be most difficult to acquire.

     Physical appearance was not the only obstacle, thanks to my already slim feminine features I could pass quite well with a little help from Covergirl and a cute shag hair style.  The things that seemed hardest for me to master were the mannerisms and the feminine decorum that the proper and genteel lady should exhibit.

    I learned my lessons well and shortly I felt I could walk, sit, stand, move and present myself in a dainty and genteel demeanor.  However, Robert Burns once said the best laid schemes of mice and men (and genteel ladies) often go awry and so it happened to me in a very embarrassing but humorous way.

     One of the first things I did in my new gender was to find a new church to attend and a new congregation of saints to fit into as a “new” woman.  I had not attended the church very long and was eager to fit into every group or outreach program the church offered.  One Sunday morning the pastor announced that a family in the area had a pool table that they would donate to the church fellowship hall, however, the church would have to pick it up and deliver it.  As the pastor was asking for volunteers to go dismantle and pick up this massive slate table my desire to “fit in” overwhelmed my desire to be genteel and lady like.  Before I could stop myself I was raising my right hand high so that all in the church could see that I was a good Christian and that I fitted right into this congregation.  It had never crossed my mind that “proper” women didn’t volunteer to move pool tables.  It did not ease my embarrassment any when the only men to accept this challenge were seven very small guys. 

      The confused looks from the other women and the whimsical looks on the men’s faces instantly told me I had really stepped in it now.  I was wearing a crème chiffon dress and spike heels, however, I would not let this get in the way in what I had pledged to do.

     Even as a man I am sure I would have drawn some puzzled looks from many.  I have always been very skinny and what many might even say frail.  Being skinny had it advantages and draw backs.  I could always walk on the grass without bending it and in a rainstorm I could almost always walk between the rain drops.  However, on the other hand I had to run around in the shower to get wet.  Such was life for me as a male but now as a woman I was no longer skinny, I was petite. 

     What was I to do?  What could I do?  The situation only became worse when after church the seven little men who had volunteered decided to go do it “right then” because that was the only time a truck would be available.  I suppose I could have feigned out an excuse but I have always done what I said I would do and this time was not going to be any different.  

     So hi ho, hi ho off to work I went, this pretty little brunette, off with the seven dwarfs to move this pool table.  When we arrived at the home of the donor I could read the expression on his face.  "Well this must be the advance party to show gratitude but when is the work party going to show up?"  As the men removed their sports coats and stripped down to their undershirts I think he finally realized that we were it.  He made some nonsensical comment that I must be the supervisor.

     Imagine his surprise when I jumped right in there and took charge.  The seven dwarfs had no tools and had no clue as to how to dismantle the table so I ran out to my Ford Ranger pickup and retrieved a small tool box.  I found the necessary ratchet and sockets, kicked off my “heels” and slid down on my back under the table and commenced to remove the table legs as the seven dwarfs looked on with mystified and horrid stares.

     Finally after the table was dismantled and slid into the back of the truck the job was completed and whisked away back to the church by the seven dwarfs.  I was invited by the donor and his wife to stay behind and share in some sweet tea and a delicious apple pie. 

     I will always remember this day how Snow White got a real life lesson how there are differences between a man and a woman and there are certainly things that women should not do while wearing a dress.

Bobbie Lang 4/5/2014

If you like the fresh and different viewpoint I have for transgender Christians struggling with gender confusion and their faith in God please follow and like me on Facebook at

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Email:          BobbieLang@reagan.com

For more information about Bobbie Lang you can get my autobiography “Transgendered Christians In Chains” on Amazon.com.  It is my heart and soul for my writings to help mend painful lives and heal painful experiences by sharing the story of my victories and the lessons learned from defeat.   It was never or will ever be my intention to push my autobiography for the purpose of monetary gain.     Amazon:   Transgender Christians In Chains